Family

Keeping the Flame Burning through the years!

Our Love Story

Our Wedding Anniversary is this weekend, August 26th. With 3 kids, a husband who works a lot and life’s unexpected curve balls, how do we still find time to keep that fire burning? My husband and I have been together for 11 years! Time has truly flown by!

Everyone knows that marriages take work! You have to be willing to make sacrifices to make a marriage work! It’s not easy, especially when you both have different opinions about things! Luckily, my husband and I have found ways to compromise with each other!

 

How We Met

Before my I met my husband, I had pretty much given up on dating and  trying to meet guys because I was tired of meeting all the “wrong” kind. I was already into my late 20’s and I didn’t even know where to look anymore. One day while I was working in a Preschool, I was talking with another coworker about guys and how we just didn’t know where to met them anymore. My friend/co-worker was an older lady, I thought of her like a mom! She was the best! While having this conversation, a father of one of the children had overheard our conversation. Not only was I embarrassed that he heard us, he actually was trying to fix me up with one of his friends that had just moved from Chicago. He promised he was a nice guy and I should talk to him! I agreed and gave him my number.

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A few days later a received a phone call from this friend, Brian and we talked for quite awhile. After a few phone conversations, we made plans for dinner and possibly a movie for the next week. We had our first date at the Cheesecake Factory. I was so nervous, I could hardly eat! After dinner, we decided to go see a movie playing at the theater where we had dinner.

One of our very 1st pictures together!

We saw the Gridiron Gang with the Rock! It was a great movie! We had a great time and he even called me later that night! From then on, we talked a lot, like we were teenagers on the phone, and made more dates. The rest is history! Here we are now, 3 kids later and we still love and respect each other!

 

Throughout our relationship and marriage, we haven’t always things easy!! When I met Brian, I knew he was divorced and had a son that lived near Chicago, Northwest Indiana to be exact.  I was fine with that! He struggled through court battles with his ex-wife about custody because it was suppose to be joint, every other weekend and so many weeks during the summer.

Well she never would abide by these rules! Brian would drive up there to see his son but she would call and have an excuse that it’s not a good weekend. This went on for years! I think the whole time we were dating, it may have been 5 times that he actually got to spend time with his son! Now that he is a teenage, 17, he was told lies about why his dad wasn’t around! Now that he knows the truth, Brian and his son actually do spend more time together! They go to soccer camps and last year went to some big soccer game in New York! It’s great that Brian has his son back in his life now because that was a huge struggle for us! It cause Brian depression not be able to spend time he deserves with own son! They are building their relationship back!

Money caused problems for us as well but we managed to fight for what we believe in! We know that communication is one of the biggest things that can save or break a relationship. In the begining, we use to fight about money quite a bit. Now we know how to talk to each other! We know what is important and how to handle our talks. Money is one of the reasons why a lot of couples divorce. We have always said that we would always talk through any problem and face it head on. That is what we have done. It has not been easy but we’ve made it!

 

Keeping the Flame Burning

In order to keep the fire burning, these are my tips! First, is communication!!! You have to talk to your spouse!! No matter what kind of issue is brewing! Communication is the key to make anything work! If you can’t talk to each other, then expect failure! When we first start dating, I knew that my Brian loved fishing and hunting. He and some of his guy friends would take hunting/fishing trips for a couple days. I knew this from the start so I wasn’t angry when he would leave with his friends to hunt! It was something I had no interest in doing! Today, we can talk about anything and everything. No holding back!

Secondly, having time for just you and your spouse is very important. Even though my husband works crazy hours and a lot. I usually wait up for him to get home. I may fall asleep after I get the kids to bed but for some reason I always seem to wake right back up when he’s not home. Then when he does get home, we can talk, without interuptions from the kids about the day or the what needs to be done for the week or so on. We try to get a date night every once in awhile, even if we have to take our youngest daughter with us! She’s not up just yet for spending more than an hour without me! Mommy’s girl!

Lastly, just having fun! Brian and I may not do everything together since he works a lot but that doesn’t mean we still can’t have fun! We love to send each other flirty text messages throughout the day! Let them know we are thinking of them! When I get a text from Brian, i’ll smile or laugh if its funny and my kids will always ask “who’s texting you?” or “why are you smiling?” It’s fun to let them keep guessing! Even at home, letting our kids see how we can be affectionate towards each other is always a positive thing. Even if we don’t see eye to eye on something, we never will discuss it in front of our kids.

It’s important in any relationship be honest and open with each other! Remember that everyone’s relationship is different but they all are delicate! Just like a newborn baby, they require dedication, love and support from both! They are worth it! I’m happy that I have Brian in my life! He’s an amazing man, wonderful father and I couldn’t be Moreno proud of the man he is!

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